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Curious goes crazy in Majorca — Angelz of Funk at BCM, 22/07/05
Reported by Lizzie Curious
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Submitted 10-08-05 12:23
“Yes,” I agreed with my clubbing buddie Hels as we munched our way through a tasty al fresco dinner and merrily knocked back the wine, “we really must pace ourselves tonight.” Little did I know (or maybe I did have a sneaking suspicion… that 12 hours later those words uttered with so much sincerity at the time would be nothing but a distant memory in my booze-addled brain. Cut to Lizzie and Hels stumbling about their hotel room making half-arsed attempts at packing, finding it incredibly amusing that they will probably miss their flight back to boring old Blighty. How very rock and roll indeed. But, I digress, so more of that later dear reader and let us return to the eve of one of the best nights of my life.
So, after a lining our stomachs with a lovely meal and a few glasses of vino for good measure, off we trotted along the promenade of Palma Nova (Magaluf’s slightly more respectable neighbour) to meet the director of BCM, Gordon. We sped off in his 4x4 back to our hotel to pick up my fellow angel of funk, Nicole, aka DJ Casa Mia — that’s ‘my house’ to you and I — who had just arrived off the plane from Scarborough. Nicole had already DJ’d for Angelz of Funk earlier on in the year, so she told me a bit about her experiences of the night and with a big grin how much fun we were going to have! Angelz of Funk is the brainchild of DJ Vicky Devine and the night has been running at BCM for over two years and so has built up a good following in Majorca. At about midnight we arrived at the world-famous BCM club in Magaluf (known affectionately to some as Shagaluf). The outside of BCM was like an exotic shopping centre, a broad staircase studded with lights was flanked either side by big palm trees and jet fountains, with water flowing around and under the stairs. Clubbers were already queuing outside and there was a real buzz in the air; every night is Saturday night when you are on holiday!
We stepped inside and I found myself in the foyer which, like many clubs these days that have the prefix of ‘super’ added to them, had a shop selling all sorts of BCM-branded goodies, a membership area and of course, lots of revved-up clubbers sashaying about. We headed into the main room to drop off our record bags in the DJ booth. The dancefloor was already pretty packed and the sheer size of the main room took my breath away! There were several bars dotted around the cavernous room and plenty of podiums and stages for the dancers, with the main dancefloor holding a whole lotta people. The DJ was belting out your commercial R&B type music, but Nicole assured me that that the resident DJs usually played cheesy chart music early on but in a couple of hours it would be big house tunes all the way… phew!
We were taken up to the top bar to get some much-needed bevvies in. I met a couple of the club dancers, who were so lithe and pretty it really would make Keira Knightley look like she needs to get down to Weight Watchers pronto! As tonight was Angelz of Funk, all the dancers were dressed accordingly in barely-there white outfits, with lots of glitter and sparkle for good measure. Gordon told us that Nicole and I would have 3 hours to play, between 2.30 and 5.30am. Nicole and I agreed that we would do an hour each and then play the last hour back to back. Then it was time to head downstairs to the main room as Gordon said he was going to announce the first laser show and then introduce the dancers. To be honest, I have seen lasers before many a time, so didn’t really think they would need “announcing”, but as lasers go these were pretty awe-inspiring. A multitude of coloured lasers beaming out from all directions over 3,000 or more (I didn’t really dare think about it) hands in the air is pretty mind-blowing. Full-on lighting drenched the crowd in a wash of oranges and purples, with bright white lighting up the whole of a club as the tune reached its peak. I just couldn’t wait to get strapped in behind the decks, but there was still an hour to go. Hmmm, how to kill time… bar anyone?
Another double in hand, I stood, with a grin akin to that of an extremely happy cheshire cat, watching the night unfold before me, not really believing that I would be DJing in just a short while — it just seemed too good to be true! In the meantime, the dancers had started the first of their many shows. These were talented dancers from all over Europe who did a lot more than the usual booty-shaking, gyrating malarkey you see on podiums. An Argentinean dancer shimmied up a 30ft rope above the crowd and contorted her body into various positions (no safety net either), male dancers performed painful looking break-dancing moves with the slightest of ease and, wait, what’s this? Get in…. a stripper!!! And the louder you cheer, the more she takes off? COME ON!! It’s all in the name of entertainment of course. And she was the only stripper of the evening — the rest of the dancers kept what little clothes they were wearing securely fastened. Meanwhile the resident DJ was in full flow with the big funky tunes and the atmosphere was totally electric, with the crowd yelling and cheering (by this time the stripper had disappeared so they were definitely yelling for the tunes!). He dropped the Tiefschwarz mix of Spektrum’s ‘Kinda New’ — one of my fave tunes — and the next thing I know the Angelz of Funk were announced over the soundsystem and it was time for me to take to the wheels of steel.
Earlier on, Gordon had briefed me that 2.30-3.30am was a crucial time and I needed to work hard to keep the crowd on the dancefloor and basically play big tunes that everyone could sing along too. I kicked off my set with a long-standing favourite feel-good track, the Tim Deluxe remix of Basement Jaxx’ ‘Good Luck’. The next hour passed in a delirious blur of filthy, funky beats, lots of mad dancing and the largest smiles known to mankind. Some bright spark even plugged the mic in for me, so I got to do some singing adlibs over the top of the tunes and generally revving the crowd up as much as possible. Tunes such as the Fuzzy Hair remix of ‘3am in the morning’ and — dare I say it? Yes, sod it — it might be corny but it sure as hell makes the dancefloor go mad — the bootleg Filo and Perry vs Doobie Brothers ‘Long Train’ rocked the funky floor.
All too soon my hour was up and it was Casa Mia’s turn in the spotlight. Hels and I took the opportunity to experience the club properly in full swing the other side of the decks. The lights dimmed at one point and dancers on the main dancing stage appeared wearing all black and UV skeletons appeared on the stage. There’s no denying that BCM is a commercial club, but the atmosphere was absolutely electric and everyone seemed to be interested in really having a damn good time. DJ Casa Mia lived up to her name and belted out the smile-inducing house tunes, such as Sex on Monday ‘Hold Me Down’ and the cheeky Freemasons vs Nokia white label. One of this summer’s sure-fire anthems ‘Pump Up the Jam’ kept the clubbers rocking and her sweet singing over the top added the icing on the cake. After some more drinks and dancing, it was time to get strapped in to a B2B sesh with Nicole for the last hour and busting some serious dance moves! One of my most impressive routines, my friend Hels took great delight in reminding me the next day, involved jumping up on a bar stool, wowing the crowd with some kick-ass ‘vouge-ing’ and then incorporating a fall off said bar stool in to a cheeky little jump and wiggle.
And yish, we made our flight by the skin of our teeth. How we managed to get the airport I’m not quite sure…I guess the taxi driver wanted to get us and our overexcited chatter about the evening’s shenanigans out of the car as quickly as possible. Two weeks later and I am still grinning from ear to ear about my BCM adventure. It’s certainly a tale to recount to the grandkids (and even if my brain cells have completely packed up and departed for a villa in Florida by that point, at least I will still have this article).
All photos courtesy of Lizzie Curious.
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Other Features By Lizzie Curious:
Devine Intervention: review of Charlys Angelz in Ibiza & interview with Vicky Devine
Tribute to DJ Matt Jay 1973 – 2005
We’re on a road to Knowwhere….. Review of Knowwhere Xmas party
A Curious adventure in Finland, 16-19 May 2003
The views and opinions expressed in this review are strictly those of the author only for which HarderFaster will not be held responsible or liable.
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